In this heart of mine, this summer has been revolutionary. God has revealed Himself so clearly. He has weeded out my dreams and plans while putting new ones in my heart. He has given comfort. He has given peace. He has caused me to be absolutely stoked about what the future holds. He has brought people into my life that understand my dreams and heart. And He has made me realize I have people in my life that will lay down their lives with mine to see a world changed for His glory.There are several reasons that I want to stir up a revolution for His glory. mainly because He said so.
but Jamie and Zaida have a lot to do with it too.
Jamie. Everyone loves Jamie. She lights up a room. She loves people without boundaries. She is so special. And because Jesus gave me Jamie, everytime I see a disabled child my heart breaks and everytime I see someone having a hard time I feel the need to help. She is such a blessing, we had no idea 18 years ago. God has molded my heart and dreams and they wouldn't be quite the same if I hadn't gone through all we have with Jamie.I wouldn't feel the need to be the voice for those who have no voice. I wouldn't be tender to the call of helping the helpless. And I surely would never imagine that kids with disabilities have one of the largest pieces of my hopes and dreams without Jamie. Jamie loves people without them having to love her. It annoys me greatly some days but she speaks to EVERYONE we see. "hello, hello" with a huge wave. And the smile on people's faces (most of the time...when they don't speak back it makes this big sister not so happy) is priceless. The love of Jesus pours out of her. And she doesn't even know it. Especially when someone opens the door for her and as we push her wheelchair by..she kisses their hand. We have told her you just can't be kissing people...but she loves hard.:) So part of this so called revolution Jesus calls us to has a lot to do with helping the helpless. He was all about not only healing the sick but making sure they were taken care of. He cares. period. and so should we.
Zaida. In 2005, I met the sweetest little girl alive in Lima, Peru. She waited for me outside the center because she wasn't sponsored. Her smile is deep. Her heart is tender. And she has seen more hurt in her life that I can probably even imagine. I will never know what it is like to go to bed hungry because there is not enough food to go around. I will never know what its like to go to the creek to bring in water filled with dirt for drinking and bathing that day. But I am so glad God saw fit to bring her into my life. And He gave the pastor direction so they could find her in that village filled with hundreds of shacks. Door to door they went, picture in hand and the wrong name in search of a little girl that didn't even know she needed to be found. Isn't it how it was with us? He sought us out. He found us. And we didn't even realize we needed to be found by Him. Now she has hope. Now she has food at least once a day. Now I can assure you this little girl will not go longer than 2 months without getting something delivered to her. Because this little girl...who I have only held in my arms 3 times...has such a large piece of my heart. My friends joke that she is my child. But really...the love is deep. She is the picture of rescue. She is the picture of hungry children being fed because of people giving their lives for His glory...(AMG International blows me away by its national workers). She knows she is loved by her Heavenly Daddy and that makes everything worth it.
Peru was obviously the main highlight of my summer, for reasons people will probably never fully understand. My heart is there but I think it is so much more than that. Part of it is that I know my calling is to be His love. period. and in Peru I feel like I accomplish that. It's almost selfish. On the mission field, people always talk about the sacrifice being made to go share the Gospel. For me, its a pleasure. I feel so happy, SO happy there. It's always been one of those places that my heart skips a beat...once again, for a million different reasons. I pray that I am His light here. I pray that I am His love here. Because when I told Him I would go wherever He told me to, I meant it. So when He keeps me here for longer than I would like...it's obvious He has a purpose. And His love will be poured out every step of the way.
My summer has been beautiful. Full of amazing people. Full of learning. Full of teaching. It will be remembered with a song, a few pictures, and a really grateful heart. BUT...in a few weeks, I start back classes. Summer will be over. Part of me is so ready to see the people and have a set schedule again. But there is part of me that is nothing but fear.
It is so intimidating walking into those classrooms knowing that you are the only Christian. Because you see, they don't ask the trivial questions. They don't care what your favorite class is. or your favorite book of the Bible. They want to know why my heart is for adoption. They want to know why I choose to follow Christ even when it is hard. They want to know how I deal with serving a loving God when the world seems to be in chaos. They get down to the issue. Because they NEED to know. And yes, they make fun of me. And yes, sometimes they say stuff for the pure fun of making me upset. But He can change their hearts. And He is right there in that classroom when they ask the tough stuff. He gives favor to me when they should hate me. I am ready to see Him do crazy cool things on that campus. In that building. And in that department. They don't want my Jesus but He wants them. And when He rocks them...it's going to be a revolution like no one has ever seen.
And to be honest being a light isn't always easy. Everyone would do it if it was.
He taught the stars to shine and they do. But here I am saying, "Daddy, it's too hard." And that disgusts me. When all He wants me to do is trust Him. And He's sitting on His throne whispering, "trust.ME.child. Don't you know I have it?"
Here's the thing though. Loving is easy for me. My heart is big. I like getting people's hearts. I like getting to know people. I just love loving people. And that is all it takes. Love is the revolution itself. Laying ourselves down. Going to talk to the person that gets on everyone else's nerves. Stopping to pray with that homeless man with whiskey on his breath knowing he is heading to the liquor store as soon as you leave. Sometimes it means giving up comfort in a world that is full of comforts everywhere. we don't have to scream. we don't have to start a riot. we don't have to hold secret meetings on how to change the world...just go do it. love them hard. and them teach them. serve them. be willing to fight. because Satan wants nothing more than for us to stop.
so this summer will be remembered by a starting of a revolution. because its happening. i see it in my friends. i see it in my city. i see it in my old high school. so people that have been in my life this summer, thank you. you're awesome. and let's continue this little revolution.
"Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard." Isaiah 58:7-8.