December, you were epic.

December is always one of those months that i love. who doesn't love Christmas trees? and parties? and singing "happy birthday Jesus?" and getting cards in the mail everyday? and the semester coming to an end? and hot chocolate? and tacky sweaters? it gets no better than that!

it's always a hustle and bustle full of smiles and a little stress before finals week. this year was no different in these areas. but it was just the best month of my life. some of the best moments of my year and the most influential conversations with people and my Heavenly Daddy happened this month. it was intense. and crazy. and i have never seen His faithfulness like i did thisDecember.

it all began with Deeper Still. i heard exactly what He wanted me to. even when it was hard and i didn't want to listen; He found a way to get it through to me during those 2 days. a caravan of 24 women joining 14,000 other women in worship and seeking Him and only Him. it made for a beautiful beginning to the month. the online became offline. He showed off His power. and glory. i got asked to repeat words. and i met a few women who are incredible and seem to know a lot about me. and there was snow. our God is crazy cool. in the tops for favorite weekends.

i finished finals the next week. Praise Jesus. Praise Jesus.

actually, the day i finished off my semester ended with a fast drive back to Albany. and a dash up the stairs at Phoebe only to wait a little while longer for the little lion man, Judah, to be born. we were all beside ourselves. on the way there i could do nothing but pray for that sweet little life about to be born. he is a world changer and a revolutionary. i know these things. with the parents he has there is no way that he won't rock this world for Jesus. he is a lucky boy. and is surrounded by a big ole community that loves him to pieces. he's the first baby in our "group" so imagine how spoiled this little man will be?

sometimes i pray things and i really don't think that He is listening. and then days like December 8 happen. and i know He is listening so very closely. and He doesn't have to prove Himself to us but He chooses to let us know that we are His and He cares about the silly stuff we care about.

there was an unseasonable snow in Albany December 8. it hardly ever snows in Albany. not even flurries happen often. so everyone was a little taken off guard of this said snow that happened. it was a little dose of happiness. and a big showing of His power. and faithfulness to those who love Him.

conversations seasoned this month. full of stories of seeing His hand in the everyday. God never forsaking those who follow Him. the callings-great and small-of a God that doesn't need us but chooses to let us work for Him. talks of the next few years. our Jesus works in mysterious ways. so mysterious. but its so exciting.

Landy Kate asked me about the "hungers." she seems to be amazed that they are my friends and i know them. she has a big heart that God is going to use in a mighty way in His kingdom and i am so thankful i will be here or there to watch it all unfold. she asks some hard questions at the sweet age of 5 and some that are almost silly but to have that faith that she does. goodness. she is a little missionary. full of compassion. and a bulletin board full of pictures of children in Peru and Haiti that she prays for. Christmas Eve i got to watch her little life be sparked. sparked in such an incredible way. holding her. standing in a room full of the homeless and lonely of our city. her eyes were wide open and i know her heart was being molded. "IB, do you know him too?" talks with Cakes this month probably rank in top ten moments of my life. its not often you find a child with love like that.

Hilary also graduated this month. my baby sister cousin graduated from UGA. and she moves to Senegal March 9. this is another post for another day. just know that i am one proud cousin.

oh, and Harber my next to last cousin turned 13. not right. doesn't seem possible. he is our little man-thats growing up!

i got together with some of the girls i graduated highschool with. it's never awkward or lame. we always pick up right where we left off. and i am blessed. its not often that you are still friends with people you graduated with years ago. its not often you have a group of women sold out to God to call friends. they encourage me like no other. and are some of the few who saw the dreams take hold in my life. it was a process and they were there to experience it every step of the way. they are amazing. and beautiful. and the perfect dose of laughter in my life!

i also got to spend enormous amounts of time with my "we do life together" friends. and people like Mandy K. and JayeJaye who pour into my life. and seeing my Jill become a mom has been such a cool thing. these are people who stand up for me. even when i sound crazy. and pray for my professors every single day. they tell me when i am wrong. college kinda puts a damper on the social life of a senior so seeing them everyday has been awesomeeeeee.

December was just good. full of friends. new and old. full of Jesus. full of family. and full of faith.

and i am at a loss. and at the end. God is too good to me. Christmas deserves a post by itself. and it will come soon:)

shine for Him. have a childlike faith. and NEVER ever doubt the faithfulness of our God. He is so worthy. of our everything.

it's about a love made public.

the last Sunday of Advent is behind us and tomorrow starts the two days where the worlds sits still and remembers. remembers a Priest who came to us in a shack. remembers a King who would lay His life down humbly for His people. remembers that moment when the angels in heaven held their breath and at His first breath let out a great big "hallelujah!" we remember the things that we often overlook. we remember that young couple whose world was completely shaken up by the birth of a newborn baby.



this past year, Luke 1:38 has been my life verse and probably always will be. and yes, it's part of the Scripture that we read at Christmas but i think its more than okay to live by it every day of the year.



"I am the Lord's servant," she said. "May it be done to me according to Your word."



imagine being Mary. a young, terrified teenage girl who had just seen an angel. probably something that most of us will never visibly see until we get to heaven. she saw an ANGEL that spoke directly to her, telling her she would carry the son of God, the healer of the nations, our redeemer, our rescuer. Mary was going to raise Him and feed Him and bathe Him and buy Him clothes and talk to him about growing up. of course she was terrified but she prayed that whatever He wanted, let it be done. and she knew God's word was pure and just and holy and there was nothing in His character that wanted to harm her so she trusted Him every step of the way.

i want to be like Mary. be willing to lay it all down. to trust Him when i am scared to death. to hold Him close and to know that He is completely mine.



i have come to the conclusion that God is also wanting this to be my goal since i have received emails and women that i love dearly praying this verse over me without even knowing. isn't our God cool?



let's talk about how cool He is. December 7 a little perfect boy was born to some of my greatest friends, Johnny and Jill. Johnny is my college pastor and Jilligan is my small group leader. to say they are family is a sore understatement. Judah Andrew came into the world and was surrounded first thing by a community that will love, sacrifice, and watch him grow up. seeing that little Christmas miracle makes me feel like all of us(especially women) can understand that night that Jesus came into this crazy world.



holding "hey jude" and watching him as he sleeps, there is nothing quite like it. and i am sure Mary felt the same way, watching our Savior breathe in and out. brushing her hand against his little rosey cheeks and praying over Him. she watched as her dearest friends and even strangers would stop by their house to love on Jesus, to give Him gifts, and to simply just stare at the miracle that is the birth of any child. Mary held that small baby knowing that one day He was going to change the world for good and for the glory of His Heavenly Daddy. she knew His small, tender hands would go on to do incredible things for His Father's Kingdom. Mary held Him tight and probably tried not to think about the coming years of Him going away.

so this Christmas, i feel like i have a new set of eyes. i am feeling Christmas in my heart a little bit different. He is peace and love and mercy. and i hope you feel every single one of those as you enjoy these next few days with your family.



be like Mary. hold Him close and love Him completely.



and be on the look out in the coming years for the world changer that is Judah Andrew.

our Heavenly Daddy made His love public for us. He didn't try to hide the coming King. He didn't keep it in the secret. but instead, He let the whole world know of the great redeemer that had come to set us free. so, this Christmas, don't keep it all in. make His love in you public. feed the hungry. clothe the poor. love on the helpless. its the way He would want His birthday celebrated.

reason 2. the ordinary starting turning into Disney moments.

2010 was one of those years for me. one of those that you can't really see the end of. one that stretched and pulled me in ways i never thought possible. i feel like i grew more in 2010 than any other year. and yeah yeah yeah, i know. everyone says that every year. but i'm serious. biggest year of growth thus far. and i think this is just the beginning.

a pretty normal statement i hear from time to time is that i am "deviant" in college culture. is this statement true? in many ways, yes. does this put a big standard to hold inn my day to day life? definately yes. its intimidating. so intimidating. and honestly, i depend on Him completely to let me shine because if it was up to me i would probably screw up every single step of the way.

my life isn't ordinary. and i really don't think He ever wants it to be. every Christian's life should look completely different, a 360 from that of the world. and this isn't easy. because we are living in such a messed up world. the commercials scream for us to pay money we don't have for stuff we don't need. and kids are getting cell phones when they are 5. and we volunteer at soup kitchens but won't dare stop to pray for the homeless man on the street because "he has been drinking." it's messed up. we sit on padded pews and eat $15 meals after the sermon about serving the "least of these." we will give money to any school in town but when the church asks for it, we claim that the preacher just wants a bigger salary or nicer car. we live in a world of materialism. we live in a world that hates Christians and if you aren't hated...you are doing something wrong. sorry to burst your bubble.

i am definately not saying i have it all together. because that is the farthest thing from the truth. i am a recovering sinner and i mess up a lot. all i am saying is, we should aim to have not so ordinary lives. who wants to be average, anyways?

i was taking a gander at my life. being nostalgic. my life has been so different and almost weird.
i grew up in ministry. i have never known anything different. i guess that is why i am drawn to other people in ministry and people older than me. i am an old soul and i am okay with that. i grew up sitting on the piano bench with my daddy practicing for Sunday mornings. i used to watch Dino play the piano instead of cartoons at the ripe age of 3 with popcorn in hand..that is not exactly normal. and then my perfect baby sister flipped our world upside down. a sister who can't walk or talk make the family dynamics far different than any other family. i sorta had to grow up fast. when you see your sister scream and cry as she has seizures back to back...you can' help but act like a grown up. i have parents who spent countless nights on their knees praying for the seizures to stop, for Jamie to walk, for Jamie to talk, for me to be able to have a normal life..funnny thing is...God didn't want us to have a normal life. a different kind of maturity came from being in my family. i always felt like no one really got me. now, some people pretended really well. but they still thought my dreams. and heart. and life was so weird. i was the one in elementary school during prayer requests asking about the people in the jungle who hadn't heard the name of Jesus. that should have been a clue, huh? and then fast forward. i dropped nursing like it was hot against what everyone said because i would meet a nice young man in school and make good money. this i did not care about at all. i was aimlessly taking classes waiting to hear His voice on what to do. and it came. and it was for something so liberal. and intimidating. and i went for it. and i had to learn to speak up. and not be the quiet student. and i had to learn fast how to share my testimony with a class full of Atheists. He taught me boldness. this large big dose of it came my way. it hit me hard. and i don't think i would recognize the quiet student i was in highschool. my old teachers seem to be shocked.

all of that to say my life isn't normal. and it won't be. and i am not sure what it will look like in 2011 but i know that it's gonna take some faith and jumping this year.

it will look like more prayers with the homeless under the bridge. and more blankets and Bibles to give out. it will probably look like more hard questions from my professors. and God proving how faithful He is by giving them the desire to seek out blogs of His servants. it will look like confirmation from God that no one can deny. it will be just another chapter in this huge, beautiful story that is His.

2010 had a few moments that in the world's eyes were ordinary. when i look back....walt disney could not make those moments more perfect. and those moments will forever be in my heart and the back of my mind. i will cherish them forever. and probably not even one person could guess what they were but that's okay because they are like little love notes from God just for me. and only me.

see God in the everyday. He is there. and He wants you to live this life that the world thinks is crazy. and weird. and sometimes lame.

live it for Him. and look for Him.

why did i like 2010?! reason 1.

Ivy Laing | Peru from Chris Fenner on Vimeo.

peru is my heart. and this one of the reasons why.


a little girl named Zaida.

and 2010 held the moment of seeing her once again.

she is a gift from God. and her life and the life of her family shows me just how big His story is.

bringing together a random meeting of a little girl in Lima. and a girl from Georgia. two families who pray for each other. and love the Lord so much. it's just a line in my story that no one else could make up.

searching door to door, she was found. and i hope i never forget that. a random chance meeting that turned into a passion so big i just don't know how to contain it.


the video captures it all so well. mad props to Chris Fenner. (@fenner403)

going deeper still.

i have tried to write about Deeper Still five times now. this time i will just post it no matter what comes out.

Deeper Still was this beautiful, perfect time of God literally whispering in my ear each and every session, every worship time, and every time in between..."see, what I told you is true."

do i think that God would tell me a lie? no. do i sometimes act like it's almost too good to be true? yes. does He ALWAYS prove Himself faithful? every single time.

it's almost creepy. okay, not creepy but completely a God thing that every single piece of Scripture that Kay Arthur spent the most time on out of Matthew (she talked about the entire book of Matthew) was written in my journal from the week before. He was knitting things together long before i got to that arena with 14, 000 other women.

"don't worry about us, we are already dead!" oh, if we lived our everyday lives this way. sacrificial. because what we have does not matter. our lives are not our own. and true worship is realizing that while giving every single glory we may receive back to our Heavenly Daddy.

as i sat there surrounded by women in every direction possible but most importantly 2 rows of women who would fight Satan himself and protect me from whatever came my way....how lucky am i? and it was exactly what Priscilla Shirer talked about. having someone in your life that will believe with you. not look at you crazy. not be a doubting thomas. but instead get on their knees and pray that His story is played out in your life. pray that your heart is guarded and your dreams are secured in Him. women that push you to go do something you feel ill-equipped to do because we know He will show up and use us. those people who push you to reach for the promises He has made and stand on His word no matter what this world might say.

and...i have such an incredible set of women who do that. a couple are my best friends. a couple are women who i trust with everything and they pour into my life: truth (even when i don't want to hear it) and tons of love. and my family is the greatest out there; although my dreams freak them out and i am positive each and everyday all of them wish i had just become a nurse...i know that they want what God wants and He doesn't want that for my life :)

i am blessed.

and being blessed is realizing that we do have treasures. that's what precious Beth Moore talked about. TREASURES. they are out there but they have to make it past our defenses. they get lost in the same trash as our time. i have so many treasures. and i don't deserve a single one of them. i have people who support me. i have a family that loves Jesus more than anything in this world. i have a family that believes what He says even when people seriously look at us crazy on a daily basis. i have friends that might not like what i will do after college, but they pray for me and support me anyways. i have this group of people who get my heart. and we don't necessarily have to live in the same place but to know that God has knitted a group of people together and they get my dreams. and fears. and my heart. is the most beautiful treasure out there.

let's just say that He showed off that weekend. and then He showed off again when something i prayed for as a safety net actually happened. and then it flurried in Albany. He likes to show His children He is more than able. He is faithful and true.

He is not lying to you. i promise.

falling. watching. learning.

i don't think i quite know how to describe these past few months other than: insanity. but i have found the most beautiful hope in my Heavenly Daddy.


He is strong. and good. and my best friend. and He doesn't say mean things to me. or criticize my dreams. or look at me like i am crazy. He just loves me. in this striking, take my breath away kind of way.

my basket is full with classes. and friends. and homework. and family. and church. and dreaming. and my homeless friends. but i don't think i would have it any other way. you take one of those things away and i am not Ivy. i need them. i want them. i love them.

these past few months, i have been typing away lettters, making lists, and sending thank-you notes all in preparation for a mission trip to Haiti in December.

but. it has been cancelled. looks like cholera is a bigger deal than i ever dreamed. and i want to be there. but His plan is bigger. and i am just being human when i say i don't understand. and my heart longs to walk those streets. and love those kids. and one day i will. the list He gave me long ago...it says so.

that week was kind of like when you are 6. and you learn how to ride your bike. you fall. you get this huge bloody scrape on your knee. you sit in the road and cry. and then your Daddy comes. he picks you up. and holds you. and whispers how much he loves you and how proud he is. and then. you get back on the bike.

that's exactly what it was like. and i am back on the bike. and i am eager to see what December holds. because my Heavenly Daddy makes no mistakes. i do. but He doesn't.

i mess up all the time. and i am not a perfect friend. and i am certainly not the best daughter or sister. but i am His. and i am a recovering sinner. we all are.

but i am thankful for His love. and for His grace. and for Him pouring out blessings. because we don't deserve it.

my small group is going through James. realling digging into it. and let me just say. it will mess you up.

because i don't go to the prisons and share the gospel. and i don't spend time at the hospital. and these things are gonna have to change.

and i have to love the poor with a deeper sacrificial love. and i don't know exactly what that looks like. but i think it started when my socks came off. and Clayton all of a sudden had warm feet.

i want to be at a point where if someone needs shoes...i take mine off. no question. and if someone needs a book at school and can't afford it...i get into my savings and pay for it. i just wanna love hard. and love them like Jesus.

i want to carry the burdens of the mourning. and love the ones who can't love me back. and turn the other cheek when people speak harsh things towards me.

and i can't do it alone. and i realize this all seems a little bit intense. but my God is one intense God. and He calls us to give away all we have to follow Him. and most days that scares me to death. and then there are days where...my Jeep could pay for a house in Africa. i look forward to the day of college graduation. i look forward to the day of running into His plans wide open. not that i am not in His plan right now because let me tell you He has great things planned for that campus. and my professors. they have no idea.

i am sorry i am rambled. my heart is kind of a mess. and i don't have it all together. and i think He likes it that way.

a revolution...more like love, less like a riot.

In this heart of mine, this summer has been revolutionary. God has revealed Himself so clearly. He has weeded out my dreams and plans while putting new ones in my heart. He has given comfort. He has given peace. He has caused me to be absolutely stoked about what the future holds. He has brought people into my life that understand my dreams and heart. And He has made me realize I have people in my life that will lay down their lives with mine to see a world changed for His glory.There are several reasons that I want to stir up a revolution for His glory. mainly because He said so.

but Jamie and Zaida have a lot to do with it too.


Jamie. Everyone loves Jamie. She lights up a room. She loves people without boundaries. She is so special. And because Jesus gave me Jamie, everytime I see a disabled child my heart breaks and everytime I see someone having a hard time I feel the need to help. She is such a blessing, we had no idea 18 years ago. God has molded my heart and dreams and they wouldn't be quite the same if I hadn't gone through all we have with Jamie.I wouldn't feel the need to be the voice for those who have no voice. I wouldn't be tender to the call of helping the helpless. And I surely would never imagine that kids with disabilities have one of the largest pieces of my hopes and dreams without Jamie. Jamie loves people without them having to love her. It annoys me greatly some days but she speaks to EVERYONE we see. "hello, hello" with a huge wave. And the smile on people's faces (most of the time...when they don't speak back it makes this big sister not so happy) is priceless. The love of Jesus pours out of her. And she doesn't even know it. Especially when someone opens the door for her and as we push her wheelchair by..she kisses their hand. We have told her you just can't be kissing people...but she loves hard.:) So part of this so called revolution Jesus calls us to has a lot to do with helping the helpless. He was all about not only healing the sick but making sure they were taken care of. He cares. period. and so should we.



Zaida. In 2005, I met the sweetest little girl alive in Lima, Peru. She waited for me outside the center because she wasn't sponsored. Her smile is deep. Her heart is tender. And she has seen more hurt in her life that I can probably even imagine. I will never know what it is like to go to bed hungry because there is not enough food to go around. I will never know what its like to go to the creek to bring in water filled with dirt for drinking and bathing that day. But I am so glad God saw fit to bring her into my life. And He gave the pastor direction so they could find her in that village filled with hundreds of shacks. Door to door they went, picture in hand and the wrong name in search of a little girl that didn't even know she needed to be found. Isn't it how it was with us? He sought us out. He found us. And we didn't even realize we needed to be found by Him. Now she has hope. Now she has food at least once a day. Now I can assure you this little girl will not go longer than 2 months without getting something delivered to her. Because this little girl...who I have only held in my arms 3 times...has such a large piece of my heart. My friends joke that she is my child. But really...the love is deep. She is the picture of rescue. She is the picture of hungry children being fed because of people giving their lives for His glory...(AMG International blows me away by its national workers). She knows she is loved by her Heavenly Daddy and that makes everything worth it.


Peru was obviously the main highlight of my summer, for reasons people will probably never fully understand. My heart is there but I think it is so much more than that. Part of it is that I know my calling is to be His love. period. and in Peru I feel like I accomplish that. It's almost selfish. On the mission field, people always talk about the sacrifice being made to go share the Gospel. For me, its a pleasure. I feel so happy, SO happy there. It's always been one of those places that my heart skips a beat...once again, for a million different reasons. I pray that I am His light here. I pray that I am His love here. Because when I told Him I would go wherever He told me to, I meant it. So when He keeps me here for longer than I would like...it's obvious He has a purpose. And His love will be poured out every step of the way.

My summer has been beautiful. Full of amazing people. Full of learning. Full of teaching. It will be remembered with a song, a few pictures, and a really grateful heart. BUT...in a few weeks, I start back classes. Summer will be over. Part of me is so ready to see the people and have a set schedule again. But there is part of me that is nothing but fear.

It is so intimidating walking into those classrooms knowing that you are the only Christian. Because you see, they don't ask the trivial questions. They don't care what your favorite class is. or your favorite book of the Bible. They want to know why my heart is for adoption. They want to know why I choose to follow Christ even when it is hard. They want to know how I deal with serving a loving God when the world seems to be in chaos. They get down to the issue. Because they NEED to know. And yes, they make fun of me. And yes, sometimes they say stuff for the pure fun of making me upset. But He can change their hearts. And He is right there in that classroom when they ask the tough stuff. He gives favor to me when they should hate me. I am ready to see Him do crazy cool things on that campus. In that building. And in that department. They don't want my Jesus but He wants them. And when He rocks them...it's going to be a revolution like no one has ever seen.

And to be honest being a light isn't always easy. Everyone would do it if it was.

He taught the stars to shine and they do. But here I am saying, "Daddy, it's too hard." And that disgusts me. When all He wants me to do is trust Him. And He's sitting on His throne whispering, "trust.ME.child. Don't you know I have it?"

Here's the thing though. Loving is easy for me. My heart is big. I like getting people's hearts. I like getting to know people. I just love loving people. And that is all it takes. Love is the revolution itself. Laying ourselves down. Going to talk to the person that gets on everyone else's nerves. Stopping to pray with that homeless man with whiskey on his breath knowing he is heading to the liquor store as soon as you leave. Sometimes it means giving up comfort in a world that is full of comforts everywhere. we don't have to scream. we don't have to start a riot. we don't have to hold secret meetings on how to change the world...just go do it. love them hard. and them teach them. serve them. be willing to fight. because Satan wants nothing more than for us to stop.

so this summer will be remembered by a starting of a revolution. because its happening. i see it in my friends. i see it in my city. i see it in my old high school. so people that have been in my life this summer, thank you. you're awesome. and let's continue this little revolution.


"Is it not to share your food with the hungry and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—when you see the naked, to clothe him, and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood? Then your light will break forth like the dawn, and your healing will quickly appear; then your righteousness will go before you, and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard." Isaiah 58:7-8.